It’s hard to believe that January is almost in our rear view mirror, a month of promises and resolutions, and lots of soft pillowy snow.
January in our home has been a month of rest and near constant illness. Homemade soups were lovingly made and served, snow was admired from our windows, and we’ve enjoyed plenty of indoor playtime with glitter and glue. January has also held some beautiful changes for me personally, as I have full committed to my job as a freelance writer, and chosen to pursue my goals relentlessly.
I haven’t let our unending household viruses hold me back from my goals and dreams for 2019. I wanted to start this month strong, and I am nearly flabbergasted by how well things have gone so far. Earlier in the month I received the opportunity to write for CBC Parents, and a few weeks later I received a green light to write for CBC Life, too. I’ve secured some exciting opportunities for other major publications as well, and it’s nearly knocked me to my knees, the shock and surprise of it all.
At one point when I was desperately ill, and the deadlines were fast approaching, I began to wonder if I could manage it all. I wondered how I, of all people, could have received these incredible opportunities. I second guessed myself and even considered withdrawing my work, afraid I was in too deep. Imposterism, that dark feeling that I’ll be exposed for a fraud, snaked its way around my mind and nearly sent me to my knees.
I spent time working through those feelings, wondering why I wasn’t allowing myself to experience professional success. Is it because I don’t have a degree in journalism? Or perhaps it’s because I always thought I would be a stay-at-home mom, and now I’ve decided I want something different. Maybe I feel too young, too inexperienced, in comparison to my writing colleagues and friends. Regardless of my age or experience, I cannot deny the fact that through hard work and dedication, I am finding success in the thing that I love the most, writing words and telling stories.
The best part of choosing this incredible profession is that I’m doing the thing I have always wanted to do, ever since I was a little girl. I love encouraging my own daughters to find their passion, and pursue it. That doesn’t mean that my six-year-old is going to become the teacher she dreams of being, but it does mean that she should give herself permission to find a job she’s passionate about as an adult. And she should extend the effort it takes to reach those goals, too.
Every time I tell myself I’m lucky to have the job I have, or the opportunities I have, I do a disservice to all of my hard work and determination over these last few years. If I own my skill and persistence, then I can hopefully inspire others to purse their own dreams relentlessly too. Whenever I feel like I’m not up to snuff, I can remind myself of how far I’ve come, and how much further I’ll go.
2019 is just getting started, and so am I.
What do you have to be proud of so far this year? Share in the comments below!
