The Christmas season has a way of both drawing itself out over months and sneaking up on you in a blink of an eye. It’s hard to believe we’re just nine days away from Christmas Day, but I also feel like I’ve had weeks of anticipating and preparing for the big day too.
This year I wanted to do things a bit differently in our home. Christmas has a way of drawing us back to our traditions that we hold close, a beautiful thing that I value and see as important. But for 2018 I didn’t want tradition or familiarity - I wanted something different.
Over the last few weeks we’ve been letting go of some traditions, and I’m choosing not to feel guilty about it. We didn’t bake or decorate cookies, we haven’t gone on any evening drives to see Christmas lights or displays, we have avoided mall shopping, and we’ve skipped some of my favourite holiday handmade markets this year. There wasn’t a specific reason for this, beyond the fact that I have felt a bit worn out and tired, and I’ve craved a more quiet and contemplative Christmas season.
Instead of focusing on some of our treasured traditions, I’ve focused on creating a space for myself to breathe and anticipate the joy that this season brings. For our family, Christmas is a celebration of Jesus’ birth and the fulfilment of a promise made by God. Most years the meaning of Christmas can easily get buried under the presents, tinsel, and gingerbread cookies. But this year I’ve been able to really appreciate the true meaning of Christmas, and I’ve had a lot of time to spend reflecting on this year and the joy that it brought to us.
It’s not been perfect, this time of letting go and quiet reflection. I tried desperately to create a family routine where we would light an Advent candle each Sunday, but we only did that the first Sunday of Advent. Instead I tend to light a candle when I sit down with my journal, creating a quiet space for me to turn-over my thoughts and reflect on my day.
I’ve also opted out of Advent readings, something I always start and fail to finish. Instead, I have been listening to Emily P. Freeman’s The Quiet Collection, a daily audio recording that is meant to prepare your heart for Christmas. It’s been a really enjoyable time for me, the five minutes I spend draw me into the meaning and memories of Christmas.
This year the memories and moments that I have brought me joy are both sweet and rich. I think of the mornings I spend reading quietly, jotting down notes or thoughts in my journal. I think of the Saturday afternoons hearing my kids play on the floor while I focus on creating a calm and peaceful afternoon - not full of rushing around and doing, just sitting and being. I think of the times that I sat with my kids and enjoyed hot chocolate after playing in the snow, their cheeks red from the cold. I think of reading a pile of books under the warmth of a blanket, and laying in bed with my girls until they’ve drifted off to sleep. I think of a fresh blanket of snow, a warm and cozy house, and a family that enjoys spending time together - even if we’re not doing a whole lot.
This year Christmas has looked a bit different for us, and I’m embracing that deep breath - the moment of pause we’ve enjoyed this month. The funny thing is, my kids haven’t asked for any of those traditions I thought were so important to keep hold of. Perhaps it wasn’t the tradition they remember about Christmas, but the spirit of being together, remembering our reason for celebrating, and wrapping themselves up in cozy moments to remember for years to come.
